Rachel
Jen
In Defense of MeMe
This is not to say that I agree with her in any way shape or form, nor is it to say that I don’t think she is a vile, contemptible, fat hating charlatan who has no place in the public eye. However, the numerous armchair diagnoses of ED, miss the point all together. SO WHAT if MeMe claims to eat 1300 cals/day (1800 if she works out that day, yay!). Instead of retorting with “OMG UR ANOREXIC!”, the response could be something like: “Big WHOOP, MeMe, that’s what works for YOU. It doesn’t work FOR ME. I know because I’ve tried it. Nor am I (or anyone else) morally obligated to live such a life simply because YOU DO.”
The whole point of the Fat Acceptance movement is that WE SHOULD NOT BE OBSESSING OVER THE EATING HABITS OF OTHER PEOPLE. That is what MeMe and the “war on obesity” does. The fact is that people come in all shapes and sizes (and colors and sexualities and genders, and mental health states) and people like MeMe Roth need to STFU about their eating habits because it’s completely irrelevant to the discussion.
Thanks to Charlotte at Obesity Timebomb for the linkage. :-)
Fat Sisters 
Patsy Nevins 11:30 am on February 26, 2010 Permalink
Sorry, but I have no sympathy for this woman. It does sound very much as if she has some issues, but, whatever her personal issues, she hates us for just being fat. I don’t care what she eats, but SHE does care what I eat, & unfortunately, while I think that this woman has some serious psychological issues & I guarantee that she doesn’t know what she is talking about, the media gives her an audience & gives her multiple opportunities to spew her hatred & misinformation, which hurts all of us & damages the chances of fat acceptance to make any progress. She & Michael Fumento & some others are the more extreme end of the fat-hating spectrum. Make no mistake, people like Meme & Michael Fumento do not care if they are lying, if they are not giving out any real facts; they want to wipe us off the face of the earth & are determined to do whatever they can to increase hatred & discrimination against fat people & to make it harder to live in a fat body. I cannot change the PERSONAL opinions of people, but when people come out in public & are given a public forum to tell me how disgusting, sick, lazy, immoral, & generally worthless & I other people like me are, I consider them to be dangerous & I consider them to be my enemies. Meme Roth could live her life any way she damn well pleases….if only she would shut the hell up & allow us to do the same!
wriggles 11:45 am on February 26, 2010 Permalink
WE SHOULD NOT BE OBSESSING OVER THE EATING HABITS OF OTHER PEOPLE. That is what MeMe and the “war on obesity” does.
Amen and well said. I’m so sick of this non-entity carrying the can for the vile tropes that are advocated by most qualified ‘obesity professionals’.
When they consistently tell us that we must lose weight on pain of self destruction, what the hell do people think they are talking about? They are talking about what MeMe is doing, thinness at any price, including ripping our guts out if necessary.
At least she doesn’t pretend that slimness is ours if we just say no to a few bon bons and go for a half an hour walk.
Why is it because she a woman of no account, like the rest of us, she subject to the same abuse we are but when some qualified arsehole-who we actually trust and believe in-because he’s you know a scientist/doctor and all- gets considered responses to his bullshit. The latter is connected to the former. Where is she differing with the advice we are being given by them?
MeMe is not the instigator of the destruction of fat people’s reputation, she’s following the same orders a lot of us did before we saw the light.
I’ve no time for her, but I want no part in demonising her in the same way we have been because above all, it reminds me of how especially women are dismissed as unqualified to give an opinion even on their own selves.
Lori 12:16 pm on February 26, 2010 Permalink
I don’t know. I agree with not demonizing her, but, at the same time, when she talks about engaging in what are clearly disordered behaviors around food–in a past interview she said she won’t allow herself to eat for the day until she does her 4-mile run, even if she doesn’t run until late afternoon–I’m not sure the right response is to just say, “Good for you, but don’t push it on everybody else.” It’s not good for her. It’s sad and it’s dangerous. I don’t think we need to be making medical diagnoses or coming up with psychiatric labels for her, but I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with pointing out that her words and behaviors point to a disordered relationship with food (which many, many people without an official ED have), are neither healthy nor recommended by health professionals, and thus should call into question her marketing of herself as an “expert” on obesity.
If there were an FA advocate out there going, “I don’t get out of bed in the morning until I eat three bags of Doritos, and you shouldn’t either” I wouldn’t personally think there was anything wrong with somebody pointing out that that is disordered behavior around food. No need to demonize or vilify or diagnose, but I do think that recognizing disordered behavior for what it is isn’t a bad thing, and is sometimes a necessary thing if somebody is holding themselves and their habits up for emulation.
Patsy Nevins 12:37 pm on February 26, 2010 Permalink
It is the fact that she takes it upon herself to declare herself an ‘expert’ & that the media gives her a forum for doing so which is the real issue. I know that there are many people like Meme out there, but they are not all getting rich & famous by telling lies & passing themselves off as ‘experts’ on subjects of which they have no knowledge, & further vilifying people who have already been vilified & discriminated against more than enough. Why is it that, as we fight for equality, access, some kind of fair treatment in this culture, we are expected to bend over backwards to be kind, compassionate, & understanding to those who abuse us? People like Meme are given all kinds of approval & opportunities to spew hatred, while anyone who speaks for fat liberation is hurried, silenced, & in any way possible made to look childish &/or incompetent, not to be taken seriously. And gender solidarity aside, when someone behaves like an idiot, that person is behaving like an idiot, & I don’t care whether it is Meme Roth, or Dubya, or Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh, or anyone else.
I refuse to listen or watch Meme, but that doesn’t mean that plenty of others, most of them much younger & more impressionable & more on the fence than am I, do not. Yes, she is spouting an extreme version of the crap we hear & read every day, an extreme version of ‘popular wisdom’ about food, eating, exercise, fat, human worth, etc., but how much of it do most people have to hear before they start to believe that, since they hear it all the time, it must be true? And how often does the media print headlines making some health claim which has already been proven to be untrue? I have people around me every day who genuinely believe that I must be unhealthy (or about to be) because I am fat, that I could get (& stay) thin if I really wanted to, that I will die young (I am already past 60, with many fat relatives who are in their 70’s or 80’s & many more who lived into their 80’s & 90’s) if I ‘don’t get that weight off’, despite the preponderance of research showing that dieting is harmful, moreso as we age, & by the time one reaches my age, that dieting/losing weight increases mortality risks by several hundred percent. I get reactions such as, “They couldn’t say it on tv unless it’s true”, from people who will watch far too much tv & watch it indiscriminately. People like Meme poison the minds of such people against us & just make things more difficult for all of us. I don’t wish her dead, but I do wish that she would shut up & go away, & I won’t apologize for that, nor for thinking that she has no business giving advice to anyone.
living400lbs 12:55 pm on February 26, 2010 Permalink
CTJen – WE SHOULD NOT BE OBSESSING OVER THE EATING HABITS OF OTHER PEOPLE. That is what MeMe and the “war on obesity” does.
Agreed.
Lori – when she talks about engaging in what are clearly disordered behaviors around food–in a past interview she said she won’t allow herself to eat for the day until she does her 4-mile run, even if she doesn’t run until late afternoon–I’m not sure the right response is to just say, “Good for you, but don’t push it on everybody else.”
I think it’s better to say “Good for you, but don’t push it on everybody else” than to say “That’s disordered”. In the case of the Guardian interview, she admitted that she doesn’t like to eat until after her run after she stated that most people should eat breakfast and that she feels it’s okay for her because she feels better when she eats after running. I actually AGREE with her that eating breakfast is generally a good idea. But I’m also MARRIED to someone who prefers to delay breakfast, because that works better for him. That’s where “Nutritionists recommend eating breakfast, but I understand some people aren’t hungry in the morning or have other reasons to delay eating.”
I do think there’s a middle ground between pointing out what is generally recommended and saying “That’s disordered.” If quoting MeMe on how she eats 1800 calories a day when working out, point out that USDA recommendation for an adult woman exercising 30-60 minutes is 2200 calories. This is clear reporting — not trying to diagnose — and it also provides more information.
the fat nutritionist 1:01 pm on February 26, 2010 Permalink
If she didn’t bring her personal habits into it in the first place, none of us would be talking about it. But she holds herself up as a paragon of perfect behavior, when those behaviors could just as easily be construed — correctly — as disordered.
They might very well be fine and healthy for her, but I don’t think it’s wrong to point out that they could be dangerous to someone else (especially as Crystal Renn mentioned given her personal experience.)
That said, I also don’t believe in making frank diagnoses of people without intimate knowledge of their entire condition, and professional qualification to do so, naturally.
CTJen 1:46 pm on February 26, 2010 Permalink
Right, but she does so to make a moral argument about her way being superior to what she perceives as the “fat” way. My point is that to engage her in this way–to react buy saying “well you’re anorexic, neener neener”–is to participate in the same moralizing that FA advocates rail against.
living400lbs 2:37 pm on February 26, 2010 Permalink
Sort of like the debates over credit cards:
“The average American family with a credit card has over 10 grand in credit card debt! Credit cards are evil! I don’t have a credit card or a debit card I use cash for everything!”
Responding with “But you’re insane! Obviously you don’t have a mortgage or a job that requires travel!” just makes it devolve into personal who’s-holier-than-thou silliness.
“But building a solid credit history is important if you want to get a mortgage” or “Some jobs requires using credit cards to travel or make company purchases which are then reimbursed” make the point that mainstream life does involve credit cards. It also avoids defensiveness.